Everyone Gets a Trophy!

This is going to be a little too deep of thinking for some, and I even catch myself falling into this mindset on occasion. I do not consider myself a liberal or a conservative; rather a human that makes up my own mind on every situation or issue rather than allowing a label to dictate the position I will choose. Therefore, when I rarely post items like this, I’m not looking to debate or devalue others ideals and values. I generally try to use Facebook, Twitter, Blogs, etc for “good” and occasionally try to post items that makes us think and reflect on ourselves. I will certainly like to hear anyone’s thoughts, but I’m not taking a position on this to declare “for or against”. I just found it to be a thought provoking read that I wanted to share. I think most of us walk a fine line with this stuff…..we tend to think we need to “prepare” our kids to be “tough” and that life overall just isn’t “nice” and/or is a “competition”.
I catch myself on occasion wondering why we don’t make our situation (community/world) better/”nicer” rather than teaching our children to adapt and be “tough/cut throat”. Other times, I catch myself thinking or saying, “how are you going to make it in the real world?” and feeding into the hardening, “toughening up” of our youth. The world might be a little better off if we taught a little more compassion as opposed to “whatever is best for you to get to the top” or insinuating that “grown up” life is never enjoyable. Is there a difference between “being tough”, “learning the hard way”, “rewarded for accomplishment” vs. grit, determination, failure, success….happiness? It is a slippery slope that has evolved over the recent decades with athletics, the workplace, and life in general. So much has changed with regards to self-esteem, even since we were children, and I have no answer if it is better or not. Do we put too much emphasis on the “object” i.e. trophy, ribbon, grade, car, home, etc? The bottom line, in my opinion, is your child needs to know that you care/approve regardless of the “end results”. Whether or not one agrees with the “trophy” or not, they should reflect more on personal reactions and “messages sent” towards your children receiving “second place” or “participation” vs. “the championship”. If children feel comfort with the reaction to these types of scenarios it will, hopefully, eventually produce a feeling of being at peace with themselves later in life, which I am confident will allow them to function just fine as adults. This is all we are after to begin with! Enjoy the article.

http://www.alfiekohn.org/article/trophyfury/

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